Noise Pollution

What the hell is noise pollution? Are you contributing to it by any means? You know when I yell, I do. But, for the most part, I don’t contribute that much. Although it happens sometimes when my mother & I enact the roles of Shahbana Azmi & Urmila in Tehzeeb.

Today I saw this aunty at the mall who must be around 55 or even more than that. She was very loudly talking to her son on the mobile; she was so loud that the guy at the counter too was irritated & at the same time, she was acting young & making faces. You may color your hair, but still you can’t hide something. Acting your real age requires a bit of grace. I’m friends with people who are 10 or 8 years younger than me & I myself look young, but still I don’t see the need to act like a little girl. Even at the book launch, I saw some really old, but extremely loud & fake people who were just into one thing – Where the fuck you went for schooling?

We come across loud people almost everywhere. I think the 2^nd example would be of my 2 neighbors. We are actually sandwiched between them. Eik tou this lady loves to call out her son’s name after every 2 hours...BILAL…BiLAAL…BILAAAL…& Bilal never responds. And their servants also talk like their owners. Literally it seems everyone is trying to break the record of loudness in the vicinity. The other story is a little grim. I often hear this female crying. When everyone is at home in the evening, they fight like beasts. I have heard them abusing each other. ‘Kamini mera bacha do’….these dialogues are quite common. Had I been in America, I might have reported them.

A couple of times when we went to watch movie on the big screen, we have encountered characters who just can’t help being so audaciously loud. Once this uncle kept on narrating the Bond story & the other gentleman who was sitting beside one of our friends farted loudly. Maybe he thought his sound would be missed, as the uncle was extremely loud. Look I have nothing against people farting, but it would be so nice, if we are not disturbed. Who could be possibly interested in that kind of sound or smell in the 1^st place?

Once this lady was narrating a totally different story to her daughter (again in a very loud voice) & according to my sister, she saw 2 movies on that day. The version of that aunty was also a movie in itself.

Whenever we go for dinner at Sajjad or any such place, we do come across attention seekers who can’t help being loud. Sometimes I do have the urge to laugh when they laugh. How can I do that all alone? I wish I had been with 10 or 15 people at that time. I suppose that’s the best response. Usually people just shut up. But I find the ones who stare more annoying than the ones who talk loudly. I have seen such absurd families who just stare at everyone.

Many years ago, I was at the restaurant & this couple was having some problem. The mother of the female didn’t like her daughter’s boyfriend & the poor bf was quite upset & loud about it. I think both of them were loud by default. Actually I heard the entire story & I vividly remember that the guy was bald & not at all nice, but they were genuinely serious & loud. I was in 9^th grade at that time, so that’s a long time ago. I still remember them, because of their story & the loudness that couldn’t be matched till I encountered that odd couple at the session.

The odd couple I saw at the seminar is my last example, so to speak. In fact I should have said ‘last but not least. Talking loudly during a seminar is something beyond me. Either they were mysterious detectives or they were lost in the moment. I think both of them were ill-mannered, particularly the guy as he was deliberately talking in that way (sometimes we could hear him, sometimes not); the woman was, by all means, loud by default. This is certainly a case of ‘Nothing is what it seems.’ Something was just not right about it, but they were loud & shameless – that’s what we know for sure, cause that’s how the picture was painted. I suspect they were detectives of highly loud tone. Unfortunately, I may not catch them ever, but this case was intriguing. You know I had taken 2 tablets of Actified P Cold before I went there, thanks to my never-ending flu & in spite of being dizzy, I didn’t miss noticing them. I must give them points for that.

Incidentally, Bermuda Triangle doesn’t only exist in the Atlantic Ocean; there are places in every city, village, town, country, & continent, where you don’t even disappear for good, but also can have fun without anybody discovering about it. And I have heard that intelligent folks seek out Bermuda Triangle everywhere. They say seek not water, seek thirst. I say seek not crowded places, seek Bermuda Triangle…if you belong to that loud specie or something of the sort.

PS I don’t have any problem with loud people as such, honestly :P I actually had fun writing on them. And if I have offended anyone by my crude humor, I’m sorry. It's neither a sin nor a crime to be loud, & yet we find this highly disgusting. Somewhere we are also wrong. Humans have the right to live how they want to, as long as they don't hurt others.